Today I’d like to talk about something that is a HUGE obstacle for you. In fact this thing is so big and so vital it might be the only thing that is standing in the way between you and the Man/Relationship/Marriage you really want.
Want to know what that obstacle is? It’s your PAST!!!!
Now you may be aware that your past is hurting you. You may be aware that you have been hurt, had your heart broken or been betrayed by a man (or several) that you had given your heart to. And you may even be aware that you are having a hard time finding love because you have some unresolved issues from your childhood because you didn’t get the love and acceptance you so desperately craved from your parents. And that has caused your self esteem and self -image to take a hit which causes you to make poor choices in your love life..
You may not even be aware of how your past has been effecting you and your pursuit of love.
So, how do you fix a problem you don’[t even know exists? (HINT: see below you'll learn a Mirror Time Exercise for recognizing it)
You see when it comes to human behavior (and creating results) 96-98% of EVERYTHING you think, say or do originates from your unconscious mind. That means almost everything you do, almost every result you create (or don't create) is predicated on what you believe unconsciously.
Have you ever wondered why one person can read a book, attend a seminar or watch a video and take that information and create amazing results yet another person can take the same resources and no results?
When I first started sharing my checklist for Love program I was amazed at how half of the people I mentored went out and created GREAT results in their love life and the other half did squat.
So having the inquisitive mind that I have I started searching for answers. I waned to know why two people, both of who had access to the same information and resources got such different results.
Now, I had been around the block and studied enough personal growth and development experts and materials to know that it had to do with the person's unconscious mind and their beliefs.
But what I learned absolutely floored me.
I learned that there were specific reasons why some created great results and others continue struggle
You see, everything you do you do for very specific and predictable reasons. You're running around autopilot and you don't' even know it.
So understanding WHY you what you do is the beginning to solving your problems.
At first I started applying this to my own life. I started looking at my relationship w/my ex-fiancee. I was miserable for three years. And yet no matter how miserable I was I stayed and kept going back for more.
It made no sense "logically" and everyone who knew me was shocked. And I must admit even I was confused at my behavior. That relationship was like a crack addiction. I knew it wasn't good for me and I knew it wasn't giving me the experience I really wanted but for some reason I kept going back for more.
So, why am I sharing this with you?
Because I want you to understand that if you have been struggling and you're having a hard time finding and creating the love you really want (and deserve) it's b/c on some unconscious level you're "wired" not to have it.
-- you feel you don't deserve it or are not worthy of it
--maybe you are afraid of getting your heart ripped out and broken again
--maybe you feel you're not good enough and no one will ever love and accept you as you are (so you have to lose weight; fix your nose, boobs or ass; or do years of therapy to "fix" yourself)
--maybe you're afraid that you'll never get the love you really want and you're so afraid of being that you settle
And I can understand because there was a time I felt the same way. The reason I stayed w/my ex for three miserable years was b/c unconsciously I was afraid that I would never get what I was looking for so instead of holding out and going for the GOLD I settled and kept going back to a Toilet Bowl Relationship
[NOTE*** Toilet Bowl relationships are the kind that make you feel like crap]
After taking some serious time and dong some work on myself I recognized that I was so desperate to fill the void in my life after my dad died of cancer when I was 15 years old. I wanted a son of my own to replace the love that was missing and my ex was the “ticket” to get me there… or so I thought.
It was an expensive learning lesson, but one which ultimately led me to the truth and once I had identified the truth I was able to do the work and turn things around.
That was many years ago and the good news is I was able to overcome my past and make the changes I needed to make to have the relationship and son I was really looking for.
So why am I sharing this with you?
Because I want you to understand that if you’ve been struggling and you’ve been struggling for a long time THERE”S A REASON!!!.
And until you identify and deal with that reason you will keep running around in circles, reading books, blogs (like this) and investing in programs and products which won”t deliver the results you’re’ looking for.
I KNOW because I invested a ton of time, energy & money looking for answers in those same sources. And at the end of the day I always wound up in the same position I started from.
The good news is that it doesn’t take years or therapy and a ton of cash to get to the real cause(s) of your struggles
But it does require knowing where to look and knowing how to fix things.
Your past is only an experience in your journey and whether it defines you or destroys you is up to you. And contrary to popular belief it doesn’t have to be that difficult.
You are not broken, you don’t need years or therapy and you don’t need to be “fixed”.
You simply need to know where to look and the tools to overcome the obstacles which are keeping you from having the type of relationship you really want…AND DESERVE!
Her’s a lil clue to help you see if your past is blocking you:
Take a step out of your life as an observer and notice if there is any kid of pattern. Do you see that you are attracted the the wrong types of guys? Do you put up walls which prevent a guy form getting to know the real you? Do you try too hard to make someone love you or stay with you? (like I did)
Do blame anyone and everything (including your parents, your age, your ex, the “boys” or online dating) as to why you’re single and struggling in your love life?
And if you notice that there is a pattern recognize that that pattern is a gift from the Universe trying to show you what to do differently for you to have the LOVE you’re looking for.
If you have any questions, comments or feedback I invite yousahre em below.
Hope this helps!
if you know that your past is blocking you I invite you to check out the GPS for Love Mentoring Program, I’d love to show you how overcome your past and use it as fuel to create the results you really want in your love life. I’m getting ready to open up 5 more spots (check your e-mail tomorrow). Last month’s spots Sold-out so if you’re interested act fast.