Arnold Schwarzenegger is a Boy, not A Man

Ok, I’ve had enough. Unless you’ve been living under a rock or holed up in a compound in Islammabad, by now you have heard that Arnold Schwarzenegger has had an affair on his wife of 25 years, Maria Shriver.

For all I know there may have been reasons (other than the obvious) why Arnold decided to have an affiar with one of his employees.

What’s interesting about this is he not only had an affair with this woman but he fathered a child with her and kept it secret for 14 years!

In this day and age how anyone can keep a secret for 14 minutes amazes me. So how did  Arnold Schwarzeneger, one of the most popular actors on the planet and the Governor of California, keep this secret  for 14 years?But whther he kept it quiet for 14 years or 14 minutes doens’t make a differnce.

I’m not here to judge Arnold and his choices. he has to look himself in the mirror at the end of the day. But I’m sick and tired of all the “boys” like Arnold, who think with their penises, giving a bad name to the men who remain loyal  and treat their women with the love & respect they deserve.

It’s the “boys” like Arnold who are selfish and only think about themselves. I have 3 little boys at home ages 7, 5 and 2 and it’s not uncommon for them to want what they want when they want it. It’s even more common for them to try and figure out ways to get what they want when mommy or daddy says “no”.

I expect this from them because their little boys. It’s my job as their dad to teach them how to live and treat others and how their choices and decisons effect others.

It’s ok for my sons to act this way becuase they’re still young. They don’t yet understand how life works.

But it’s not ok for adults to act this way. But can we blame them? We live in a society where “instant gratification” is all around us. We have a pill for every problem in life and  these pills often tout instant and  fast relief.

Instead of getting to the cause of our problems and fixing them we just pop a pill to make the symptoms go away.

We have informercials on all 3,ooo channels constantly promising us instant and miraculous results (although the results shown are not typical). And don’t forget about the  “fast food” companies selling us “industrial sized, super value meals for just twenty-nine cents extra.

Our lives have all become about the “now”. If we don’t care about the effects these things have on ourselves how can we care about how our choices and decisons will affect others (including our spouses.)

Look, I’m a guy who has eyes and a penis just like  other guys. Do I appreciate a beautiful woman? Yes! When a good looking woman crosses my path do I check her out? Yes! Do I notice a certain part of her anatomy? Yes! (i’m a boobs guy!). But that’s where it stops.

Do I act on any of these impulses? No!  Do you want to know why? Because the relationship I have with my wife isn’t worth throwing away.

The differnence between men & boys is that men have integrity and honor their commitments. If Arnold wanted to fool around then he should have told Maria and he should have divorced her.

That’s what a man would do. There are lots of good men out there who love and honor their women who actually enjoy being in a committed relationship. My wife is my best friend, my life partner and my lover.

She is everyhting I want and need so why would I throw it a way. You see another differnce between a man is that a man sees the big picture and makes decisons and choices in accordance with it.

Unfortunately, there are a lot of “boys” out there and our society tends to give them the headlines and spotlight. But remember there are lots of “men” out there as well and when it comes to finding the “man” of your dreams you simply need to remember … you only need “ONE”.

6 thoughts on “Arnold Schwarzenegger is a Boy, not A Man

  1. The truth is there are lots of jerks out there. But there are also lots of bad restaurants, mechanics, hair dressers, etc.The key is simply to find the ones that work best for you.Inn this day and age it is wise to have a fence to keep out the unwanted visitors, but keeping up a wall will keep everyone away and make it hard for you to allow a man in to your heart and your life

  2. Joe, I love your advice! Every day, the media encourages us to have instant gratification i.e. whatever we want; we should have regardless of the process to get it or the consequences. Women have been influenced to shop for clothes, shoes, and accessories because society only values beautiful bodies. Likewise, men have been influenced to have the job title and money. But in the fine print we equally need personality, knowledge and skills to go with it. We see and hear about these boys so much that it seems the world contains 99 boys and one man and so we feel frustrated. It is great that you remind us that this is far from the truth. It still makes it difficult to trust but even though we can’t keep up a wall, we still need a fence to screen and keep out the unwanted ones and only let the others in.

  3. Hi Nellemarie.I don’t have a brother. I only have one uncle left and he’s been happily married for over 60 years. I don’t think u’d want to date my cousins who are still single.But the good news is there are plenty of “good” single men out there. It’s not as hard to find em as you think. But if you find it hard to “trust” a guy and you have your walls up you will make it much harder on yourself to do so.”To get the good fruit you have to be willing to go out on a limb”Here’s a helpful hint: If you don’t expect things form guys you will never be let down/disppointed. Years ago i realized that THE MAJOR SOURCE of frustration in my life was when people did not meet my expectations of how I thought they should think & act.I simply stopped expecting things form people and overnight 99% of my stress disappeared.Instead of “expecting” things I clearly defined by boundaries on how I would let people treat and act toward me and when they didn’t act/treat me the way i desired, I simply moved on. No stress, no Drama, no games.Try it out and let me know how it goes.

  4. Mary, you may “root’ him out but once you discover that he isn’t the type of guy that you desire there is only one thing you must say…..”NEXT!” If you don’t play with the pigs, you don’t get the swine flu!

  5. Put me in a room of 100 men. 99 are mature, emotionally available and have a job. Add one boy-in-a-man’s-body and I will root him out like a pig finds truffles. The good thing is, now I’m recognizing it and going, “Oops! Sorry! My mistake!”
    Progress!!

  6. Do you have a brother, uncle, cousin??? I think your wife is a very lucky woman but here are not many “men” like you out there. It’s hard to find someone let alone trust him to be the “man” you deserve or expect him to be.

    Thanks for the article.

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