Why Focusing on Chemistry is a BIG Mistake


Did you know that focusing on chemistry is one of the biggest mistakes you may be making in your love life?

It’s not that chemistry isn’t important. It is. But it’s not the first thing you should be focusing on.

In this video you will learn why focusing on chemistry is a big mistake and what you should be focusing on instead.

If you find yourself being attracted to guys where there is great chemistry in the beginning, but who always let you down and break your heart, this video is for you.

Watch Here…


How important is chemistry to you? Is it at the top of your list or are there other things you focus on and look for first?

Scroll down and share your thoughts, questions and feelings on “chemistry” and today’s vblog.

Much Love,


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6 thoughts on “Why Focusing on Chemistry is a BIG Mistake

  1. Joanne Coleman says:

    You are so right!

    If I cannot see myself kissing him when I meet him, I am soon gone. however, if I do feel a physical attraction, then I start seeing how else we are suited, and I focus on that.

    I also find that on the first coffee date, I may like him physically, but then when I see him for the second date, he is not what I remembered even though it was only a week ago. I believe we project our hopes and desires on him, and then we forget what is really important. Looks are subjective at best.

    Compatibility is the key. Do we have similar interests and points of view, or if we do not, is there a willingness to agree to disagree?

    • Jan says:

      Omg Joanne this is exactly what happens to me!! Sometimes I have a date and think wow…..then on the second date he is so not what I thought he was regarding looks and personality…….so weird and disappointing….time for me to take a break from cyber dating I think 😉

  2. Rina says:

    Hi Joe!
    You are focusing on cases of people who you have chemistry with but are EXTREME assholes. There are also cases when there is chemistry with the guy and he is an asshole but not to such an extent…I mean, the examples are not that fitting: come on, how many guys would say “No” if you asked them to go and buy your medicines? Of course I wouldn’t choose a guy who wouldn’t go and buy medicines for me if I was ill!!! But there are so many cases where it is not easy to see clearly and choose the best for yourself, also considering that perfection does not exist, so it is sometimes difficult to see if the faults in the guy are acceptable, as part of the unperfect nature of humans, or if they are really unacceptable. Do you understand what I mean? Also, you’re saying that we mustn’t focus on chemistry, but I’ve seen your wife and she looks attractive and sweet. And she happens to be compatible with you, your values and your vision of life! Do you realize how lucky you are? Do you know how many people you happen to meet, for whom you feel zero or very little attraction? I have met or keep meeting men I feel no attraction (chemistry?) for, some are even repulsive…why should I give these men a chance? I know that I will never love them. I think that in my life I have met very few men I felt attraction for. Have I been unlucky? You will probably say that I’m very selective, choosy, right? 🤔🤔

    • Rina,

      I apologize but never knew there was different levels to being an asshole. In my world you’re either an asshole or you’re not. The level of asshole-ness is irrelevant.

      It’s kind of like being pregnant. you either are or you’re not.

      Unfortunately I disagree.

      I think it is easy to see who is compatible with you and who isn’t.

      The problem for most individuals is that their emotions often cloud their judgment.

      If you watch my videos I never say a woman should give a guy a chance if she has “NO” attraction towards him

      There is a difference between being selective and being too picky

  3. Hi Joe
    You are brilliant at explaining the love compatibility between two people , I am going through a situation where I am dating a really great guy who ticks all of the boxes but I’m not feeling the sexual attraction but I do feel emotional attraction my head is confused will I stick with him or leave the situation altogether I’m 64

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