Are Your Walls Hurting You or Helping You?

I was recently having a conversation with a woman and within a few minutes of talking to her it was clear that she had up an emotional wall2wall….A BIG ONE!

And I must admit when I was younger I would have judged this woman. But as they say with age comes wisdom. Now I must admit I’m not that smart and I know I have a lot more to learn in my life. But I think I’m a lot smarter than when I was younger (or at least I hope I am).

One of the things I have learned is that everything a human being does they do for a very specific and predictable reason.

And the same was true for this woman. You see the wall she had put up was there for a very specific reason, to protect her from getting hurt…again.

In talking to this woman it was clear that emotional pain she had experienced had taken a toll on her psyche. She had been hurt a lot, especially by those she loved. There were several experiences of pain that she had not dealt with, with her parents and ending with her ex-husband.  And even though she had read a lot of books and done some work on herself the emotional scars of being hurt and betrayed by those she loved had still
not healed.

So, it is understandable why she put up the walls. The only problem was that her walls were preventing her from having the love that she really wanted.

You know the irony with putting up an emotional wall is that it actually hurts you more than it protects you. And that’s part of the problem because most of the time you’re not even aware how strong your wall is.

An emotional wall makes it impossible for you to open up and be vulnerable enough for love to find its way into your heart. And even though the wall may protect you from being hurt or betrayed it hurts you more because it prevents you from opening up to love.

And do you know what the irony is, most of the time you’re not even aware that these walls exist because they’re created by your subconscious mind. And when it comes to keeping you safe and protecting you your unconscious mind is very crafty & creative.

And this is exactly what happened with this woman. She created such a defense mechanism and it was so automatic that she wasn’t even aware that it was there. And it was exactly why she kept picking guys the “wrong” guys, guys who were emotionally unavailable and never able to give her the love she says she wants.

You see it was no coincidence that she kept picking the wrong guys. Because even though these guys might disappoint her and let her down she never had to open herself up and be vulnerable because unconsciously she believed that if she did she would only experience more pain.

So today, I invite you to take some Mirror Time to see if you may have unknowingly put up a wall. And if you’re not sure there’s an easy way to learn. Simply look for a pattern. Do you consistently pick the wrong men? Do you favor the “boys” over the “MEN?” Do you make it difficult for a guy to get close to you? Do you have trouble trusting and opening up and being vulnerable?
All of these may be signs that your wall needs to come down

And if you notice one of these patterns in your life I invite you to take down that wall and replace it with a fence, one which will keep out the “BOYS’ and only allow in the “MEN.”

If you have any questions, comments or feedback I invite you share’ em below.

Hope this helps!

Much Love,

P.S. If you know you have a wall and you’re having trouble taking it down I invite you to check out the GPS for Love Mentoring Program, I’d love to help you tear it down. I’m just getting ready to open up 5 more spots (check your e-mail tomorrow) so if you’re interested act now. Click Here for more info.

The REAL Reasons Why Men Cheat

Being cheated on and betrayed is one of the worst experiences we can go thru in life.

Unfortunately in most cases the reason why a guy will cheat has little to do with the person he is cheating on and everything to do with what is going on for him emotionally

If you’ve ever wondered what causes a guy to cheat on a woman, especially when he says he loves her, this video is a MUST

Watch here…

If you’ve ever been cheated on I invite you to  take some time to post any questions, comments and feedback you may have below.

Your insight and feedback is essential and may help another member of the GPS for Love community who may currently be struggling with being betrayed by a guy she loved

Much Love,


How To Get Over Your Ex

Having trouble getting over your ex?

Tired of listening to your friends and loved ones tell you “Things will get better“, “There’s someone better out there for you” and my favorite, “When the time is right the right one will fall into your lap”

I understand. Because what they’re telling you logically isn’t helping you get rid of the pain you are feeling emotionally.

So I decided to create a video that describes 3 steps you can take to heal that emotional pain so that you can get your ex out of your head and out of your life… for good!

Watch here…

After you watch the vblog make sure to post the one step you are going to take today which will take you one step closer to getting over your ex.

Much Love,



How To Keep A Guy Interested in You

Ever wonder if there was something that you can to do keep a guy interested in you?

Well, there is. In fact there’s two things that you MUST do if you are going to get a guy to want to be with you and only you.

Now if you’re looking for some cheesy tips on how to manipulate or trick a guy into being with you.

I’m talking about two real life, practical  strategies which are so common sense that most single women are overlooking them.

But then again when it comes to dating and relationships common sense isn’t so common

Watch here…

After you watch the vblog make sure to take some Mirror Time to see which of these two areas you could improve upon.

I invite you to post any observations, questions or comments you may have below

Much Love,



Can You Love Yourself Even When You Suck?

Today I want to share something that happened to me and how it can help you find a man who will love and accept you for who you are. love yourself

On January first I decided that I wanted to get in better shape. The Big Five-O is coming around the corner and one of my goals is to be in the best shape of my life when that day occurs.

So in January I decided to kick things into gear and by mid-march I was at a weight I hadn’t seen in over 20 years.

I was feeling really good about myself. My energy was thru the roof, I really liked what I saw in the mirror and everyone was complimenting me on how good I looked (I’ll admit my ego was loving it!)

But then May came and it all started to go downhill

It started first on my birthday when Natalie got me a birthday cake made of cupcakes by Mr. Cupcake (if you’re in north jersey find a Mr Cupcakes near you and GO!)
And from the moment I ate that first cupcake it was all downhill.

The next two months were filled with birthday’s, holidays, parties and BBQ’s and because Natalie & I both come from Italian families most of these events revolve around…FOOD.
So, guess what?

All that hard work I had put in since the beginning of the year went down the toilet. This morning went I finally had the balls to get back on the scale ( I had been avoiding it b/c I knew I wasn’t going to like what I was going to see) I got really pissed…for about 10 seconds

This is not the first time I’ve gone thru this cycle. In fact it’s happened a lot in my life. I’ve struggled with my weight since I was a young boy.

Instead of beating myself up (like I used to ) I simply decided to get back on the wagon. So, first thing this morning I went fro a 45 min bike ride.

I’m at the point in my life where I’m done beating myself up because I’ve learned that it really doesn’t do any good.

I’ve learned that in order to have inner peace it’s important that you learn to love and accept yourself .

It is so much easier to find a man who will love you for you when you learn to love yourself..even when you suck!
There’s this myth out there that you have to be perfect and be a size zero before a guy will love you and want to be with you.

And it’s bullsh*t!
Yes, that may be true for the “boys” but those guys make horrible boyfriends and husbands.

The RIGHT guy will love you for who you are, the good, the bad and the imperfect. Because your imperfections are what make you unique.
And any guy who won’t love and accept you for who you are simply isn’t the right guy for you and isn’t’ worthy of your love.

I can promise you that the more you are able to love and accept yourself, the easier it will be to find that guy who will love you because one of the things that is most attractive to a man is a woman who knows who she is and who isn’t afraid of being vulnerable.

Is there a part of you that you have trouble loving and accepting. Do you think you have to be or do something different before a guy will love you?

If so I invite you to share your struggles below in the comment section of today’s blog. What you’ll see is you’re not alone.

The GPS for Love community is a safe place to receive the guidance, feedback and support you need to help you on your journey in finding the love you deserve

Hope this helps

Much Love,

if you know someone who is struggling and who may benefit from today’s blog please do them a favor and forward this to them. It may be the pick me up they need.

What To Do When A Guy Pulls Away

Have you ever been involved with a guy who suddenly changes his behavior and starts pulling away?

And you’re wondering what happened and how you can get him back?

In today’s video you’ll learn why guys like this tend to pull away and how to recognize the red flags which show you that a guy isn’t the MAN you thought he was

After you watch today’s vblog I invite you to answer these questions

1) Have you ever been in this position?

2) What did you do and how did it work out? 

3) If this was happening to you now, what would you do?

And then make sure to post your repso0nses, questions and feedback below so that the other members of the GPS Community (including Kate) can learn from your experience


Much Love,


3 Signs You’re With The Wrong Guy

Have you ever wished you knew how to quickly decipher if a guy was good for you?

In this video you will learn how to recognize the 3 signs which let you know that a guy is really Mr Wrong, even when you want to believe he’s Mr. Right

Watch here…

After watching this video I invite you to take some Mirror Time to look at your past relationships (or your current one) to see which of these signs you were missing (or chose to ignore) and then see what you can do differently the next time.

Feel free to share any observations, questions or comments below on today’s blog.

Hope this helps.

Much Love,


Afraid You’ll Never Be Loved For Who You Are?

Happy Hump day. It’s a beautiful sunny day here in New Jersey and Natalie and I are headed out the door to spend the afternoon at the lake with the boys. But before I go I wanted to share good enoughsomething that may help you in your love life.

There was a time in my life where I was very unhappy in my relationship. And to be honest it was a part of me that was unhappy with myself.

And because I was unhappy with myself I stayed in a relationship that I never should have even started.

You see there was a part of me that was afraid that I would never find the love I was really looking for and there was a part of me that thought I had to be someone else and and do things a certain way in order to make someone stay with me and love me.

I was afraid of being myself because I was afraid that I would never be loved for who I was. And behind that fear was the fear that I would never get to experience the love I really wanted.

Unfortunately, it took the end of that relationship, just 30 days before we were to walk down the aisle, to make me realize what I had been doing wrong.

After that relationship ended I decided to take some time off. I decided to take some Mirror Time to see what it happened.

And what I learned was amazing… and shocking.

After taking a good look at myself and my relationship history I realized that I had a history of jumping into relationships too soon and staying in relationships too long.

And after exploring that I learned that there was a part of me that felt I wasn’t good enough as I was.

And I gotta a tell you I was shocked. Because up until that point I thought I had it all together. I was confident (or so I thought) and I thought I was portraying a picture of someone who had their stuff together.

But the truth is it was a facade. And worst of all this facade was preventing me from being the person I needed to be to create the relationship I really wanted.

So after the mirror time I decided to make some changes. I decided to make choices and decisions which were in alignment with the type of relationship I really wanted. And I decided that if a person couldn’t love and accept me for who I was then they were simply the wrong person for me.

All of a sudden, I started seeing different results in my love life. I no longer jumped into relationships. I no longer stayed in relationships weren’t serving me.

And what was really cool was that within a few months of making the small changes I was able to find and attract the person who gave me the love I was really looking for.


Well, I’ll let you decide for yourself. But I can tell you this. I find it quite ironic that for 15 years I struggled and went from one dead-end relationship to another and then within a few months of making some changes I was able to find the love of my life.

I’ve come to learn in my journey that there is no God/Universe which favors some and denies others.

And in fact, I’ve come to learn that God/Universe is always working for you and guiding you.

All of the crap that has happened (or is happening) is the Universe’s way of trying to get your attention so that you can make the changes you need to make to create the result you really want.

But the question is are you listening and are you making those changes?

I believe part of the reason most of us struggle is because we believe we are  not good enough.

And I believe a lot of the blame goes to society, especially the advertisement industry.

We are constantly bombarded with images and products telling us how to get prettier, younger,sexier and more fit.

And the underlying message behind all of this is you’re not good enough as you are.

And these campaigns are brilliantly designed to make you feel like crap so that you’ll spend your money to buy their stuff.

Unfortunately, this takes a toll on your psyche and causes you to unconsciously buy into the story that you’re not good enough.

But I’m here to tell you you are good enough. You are perfect as you are. You don’t need to change or be someone or something to find love.

The only thing you need to do is to show up and be the best you that you can be.

And that is where the struggle lies. Because it sounds so simple but you’re fighting against years of unconscious programming…including your parents.

So today I invite you to take some Mirror Time. I invite you to take a good look at your life and see where you have made (or are making) choices and decisions which are working against you.

And I invite you to see what changes you need to make to start doing things differently.

And after you take that mirror time, I invite you to share your observations questions or comments below on today’s blog

The GPS for love community is a safe place to receive the support and guidance you need to navigate the complex world of men dating and relationships.

Much Love,

If you’re struggling and having a hard time trying to figure out why you’re not creating the results you want in your love life I invite you to check out the GPS for Love Mentoring Program. I created it specifically to help you speed up your learning curve so that you don’t have to continue to learn the hard way…like I did.

How To Get a Guy To Respect You

Do you have a history of getting involved with guys who don’t respect you?
Did you know that there are some specific things you can do to earn  a guy’s respect?

In today’s video you’ll not only learn what those three things are you’ll learn how to use them to recognize the right “MAN” when he comes along

After you watch the video take some Mirror Time to see which ones you’re doing well and which ones you may be lacking.

If you have any questions, comments and feedback I invite you to post em below on today’s blog.The GPS for Love community is  safe place to receive the support and guidance you need so that you can create the type of relationship you really desire…and deserve

Much Love,


The Freedom To Walk Away

Happy 4th of July! Today is a big day here in the USA because we’re celebrating our Independence Day. But today it’s more than that for me. It’s a celebration of my…FREEDOM.                                                200292204-001

And for me freedom is HUGE with a capital H…U…G…E.

In fact, I’ve learned that freedom is one of my top emotional core desires. For me it’s like air. Without it I’m dead inside.

Anytime I’m in a situation, experience or relationship where I feel like I’ve lost my freedom I immediately start to feel a constriction in my soul.

I’ve come to learn the reason for this. Part of my journey on this planet is to be the best me I can be and I can’t do that if I don’t have the freedom to express myself and be true to my heart’s desires.

Now before I share more let me clear the air. To me freedom isn’t an excuse for hedonism. It doesn’t mean that I do what I want, when I want and how I want without taking into consideration how my words and actions are effecting others.

NO, that’s not what I’m saying at all.

What I’m saying is that to me, freedom is about being the BEST me I can be and making the choices and decisions which allow me to continually grow and experience the best that life has to offer…including an amazing relationship.

But it wasn’t always like that for me. Several years ago I traded in my freedom for a relationship. And I stayed in that relationship because I was too afraid to leave.

Why?  Because I thought I would never find anyone else.

Even though I was very unhappy in that relationship I continued to stay. And what’s worse is that I completely lost who I was in order to try and make “her” happy and to make the relationship work.

And the irony is that no matter what I did, no matter what I said, no matter how much I sacrificed and put my needs on the back burner, I never got what I was really looking for.

Being in that relationship felt like an emotional prison for me. And I remember that as my wedding day was approaching instead of being excited I felt like I was heading for the electric chair.

That relationship was one of the most emotionally painful experiences of my life, but it is also one of the experiences I am most grateful for.


Because it made me look in the mirror to see what I had to do differently.  It made me see that I had to pick a partner that allowed me to be me and who loved me for who I was…warts and all.

And it also made me see that I never had to stay in a job, relationship or experience that wasn’t working for me.

That emotionally painful experience became an expensive learning lesson which taught me one of life’s most valuable lessons…..if something or someone is not working for you than you have the freedom to walk away.

You have the ability to stand up for yourself and say…”Sorry this isn’t working for me.”

And you have the right to walk away and go find the job, guy or relationship that will work for you.

And yes, it may be scary. it may bring up a lot of fears and uncertainty about the future. But is it any more scary than staying in a job or relationship that is wasting more of your precious time?

So, today on Independence Day here in America I invite you to take some Mirror Time and ask yourself…”What am I avoiding?” What am I not walking away from that I know is not serving me?”

And when you ask that question, you’ll see that some fears will come up.

Please notice them and identify them because it is those fears which are standing in the way and blocking you from having everything you want in life….including an amazing relationship with a guy who rocks your world…in and out of the bedroom!

Have a great 4th!

Much Love,

P.S. If taking some Mirror Time reveals there is something you are avoiding or not walking away from that you know you should I invite you to share and get some support from the GPS for Love community.

The GPS for Love Community is a safe place to receive guidance and assistance and to realize you are not alone.