Happy Hump Day!
Natalie & I are off to a day at the beach with the boys. Summer is winding down and we want to get in a few more day trips before the boys head back to school.
But before we hit the road I wanted to send you about an e-mail that will help you recognize if you’re ready for the type of relationship you really want…a GREAT relationship.
You see there are some women out there who simply want a relationship. They are so lonely and so desperate for the attention and affection of a man that they will take any guy that will pay attention to them.
But if you’re reading this you’re probably not one of those women. BIG HIGH FIVE!!!
And that’s a good thing because the majority of those women will never have the happy and fulfilling relationship they are searching for.
Because in order to have a GREAT relationship you have to do things a certain way.
One of the things that helped me in my journey was realizing that a GREAT relationship was simply a RESULT.
It was no different than getting in GREAT shape, having a GREAT, successful business or having a GREAT relationship with a friend.
None of these things happen by accident and the people who experience GREAT results in their life simply do things differently than the people who don’t.
The BIG AHA for me was understanding that a GREAT relationship was a result and if I wanted to create a GREAT result in any area of my life then the best way to do that was to learn from and model those individuals who already had that result.
Tony Robbins, one of my mentors once said that “success leaves clues.”
Well those three words have become a mantra for my life but I’ve also realized that “failure leaves clues also.”
In fact, I believe that we can learn the fastest by looking at our mistakes and failures.
Whenever I do a consultation with someone I can tell within five minutes if they are emotionally ready for a GREAT relationship.
How do I tell?
I ask them about their past.
And if they are filled with anger, hurt, despair or vitriol for their ex I know they are not emotionally ready.
You see, there is this thing called life that happens after the wedding and if you’re not emotionally ready and you pick a partner who is not emotionally ready then the stuff that life is going to throw at you is going to cause problems and destroy your relationship.
What you must realize that if a “MAN” is going to commit the rest of his life to you he must be confident that his life is going to be better and he’s going to be happier with you in his life.
And one of the ways a MAN will recognize if you’re the right woman for him is by seeing how you feel and deal with your past.
If a guy sees that you still have some issues with your ex, you’re angry, controlling, jealous, insecure, needy, and desperate to take any guy who will pay attention to you he’s gonna get scared and he’s gonna run away.
I know because I was once one of those guys.
After calling off my engagement with my ex I realized that if I was going to have a GREAT relationship I had to screen the women I date better.
And one of the ways I did that was by looking at how they dealt with their past.
You see, we all have pasts. But it is how we deal with the past that determines if you have a GREAT relationship or a mediocre one.
So, today I invite you to take some Mirror Time and ask yourself this one question…..”Are you grateful for your past and can you see it as an expensive learning lesson?”
If you answer “Yes,” congratulations I believe you are ready for the love you are seeking,
However, if you answer “NO” and you find out that you are still angry, hurt, sad or afraid that you’ll get screwed again I invite you to face those feelings and deal with them.
Because if you don’t deal with them now, you’ll have to deal with them later.
One of the lessons I’ve learned in my life is that running from the past causes so much more pain in the long run than the pain of just dealing with it.
After taking some Mirror Time and answering today’s question I invite you to share your observations, questions and feedback over on today’s blog.
Hope this helps