When it comes to your love life do you often find that you second guess yourself?
Has the pain of your past left such an impact on your heart that you’re afraid of giving your all because your afraid that you’re gonna get screwed again?
And as a result do you live in a constant state of analysis?
And if you’re like me, you’re so analytical that you often wind up analyzing your analysis. Right?
Well, Second guessing yourself and confronting your fears can often be a good thing…a very good thing. But when that analysis creates such fear that you prevent yourself form going all in and going for the GOLD that becomes a problem…a very BIG problem.
And I can relate because I’m in a period of my life where I’m going into uncharted territory. There is so much I want to do here at GPS for Love. There is such a desire for the “result” that I want to achieve, but with that desire comes a lot of fear.
And most of that fear comes down to one thing…being afraid that if I give it my all I’m not gonna succeed…again.
Because the truth is, I’ve failed A LOT! And every time I have fallen down there has been a part of me that has wanted to quit and give up. And I could easily come up with all of the excuses as to why it was easier or better to quit.
But when I faced my fears I ultimately realized that the reason I wanted to quit was because I wasn’t really sure if it was gonna happen. And that was what really scared me.
But what kept me going was knowing that if I gave up IT WASN’T GOING TO HAPPEN!!!
And that is what I’m currently experiencing right now. Just like you there is a part of me that is scared sh*tless that my dream isn’t going to happen. I’m afraid that if I open myself up and g for the GOLD that I will fail.
The only difference is that I’m afraid that this whole GPS for Love thing won’t happen and you’re afraid that the relationship you really want won’t happen. Right?
You see, no matter how unique we think we all are we really are so similar.
We all experience very similar problems and challenges in life. And yes those problems may come in different shapes, colors and sizes but ultimately at the end of the day, they’re all very similar.
And that’s the good news.
Because now that I’m a lil further down the road in my life I no longer see my fear as a problem. I see it as a compass showing me what I need to address and work on.
And once I meet that fear head on and deal with it, it makes it much easier to get thru it.
The BIG problem for most of us is that we run from our fears and let them control us. And there’s a reason for it. No matter how much we logically say we don’t like or want our fears on some level there’s a payoff to having them.
For me I’ve learned that my fears keep me in my safe, comfortable world and keep me from opening up and being vulnerable. And because I don’t have to be vulnerable I don’t have to fail, get hurt or…get screwed again.
But the problem is when we let our fears run us we make it so much more difficult to create the results we really want in life…including an amazing relationship.
I remember when I walked away from my engagement four weeks before I was supposed to walk down the aisle. I remember not sleeping that night and being so paralyzed by the fear. I remember staring at the ceiling and having every possible fear go thru my mind.
“Did I do the right thing?”
“What if I never meet anyone else?
“Am I asking for too much?”
And even though I knew in my heart that I had made the right decision Id be lying if I didn’t admit that I was scared that I would never find the love that my soul so desperately craved.
SO I decided that I had a choice.
I could learn from my past and see it as an expensive learning lesson or I could run from it and avoid it.
I knew if I chose “A” I would increase my chances of having the relationship I really wanted. and if I chose “B” I would continue to struggle and I would increase my chances of having another crappy dead end relationship.
So why am I sharing this with you?
Because right now if you’re reading this there is a part of you that is afraid.
And that part of you is preventing you from gong all in. Right? It’s stopping you from really opening up to the MAGIC that can happen if you face your fears and go for the GOLD.
It’s your fears which are blocking you from having the amazing relationship you really want…and deserve!
And the only way to slay your fear is to face it head on and kick the sh*t out of it.
Yes, it may be scary and it may be easier for you to run and avoid it, but when you get to the end of your journey what will you regret more…
A) Running from your fear and knowing you were never able to have the AMAZING relationship you really wanted
B) Facing your fear, conquering it and creating the type of relationship that most others can only dream of.
The only way to get past your fear is to go thru it and the only way to go thru it is to identify it.
So here’s a lil “Mirror Time” exercise for you. Simply ask yourself…”what am I really afraid of”. And once you identify it, head on over to the GPS for Love blog and share your answer.
And don’t worry when you get there you will see that I have already shared my fear so I’m not asking you to do anything that I’m not willing to do.
The GPS for Love community is designed to help us all support and guide each other because when you know that there are others who have your back, who want to support you when you are struggling it is much easier to face your fears.
You are not alone and We are here to help. But the only way we can support you is for you to share what you’re struggling with.
As always the action happens below on the blog. Make sure to leave a comment or question on today’s blog, The GPS for Love Community works best when we’re all sharing, supporting and assisting each other.